My reality, their reality, our reality

Most might argue that the advent of feminism began recently. For me, I think it started when Eve gave Adam the apple to eat. She’ll constantly remind him every time he complained “Dude, if it wasn't for me, you’d still be in the garden prancing about, so I shouldn't be the slave”.  We often try to separate the reality from our reality. (Did you even get that?) Why don’t I explain?

Silence connects us in more ways than words. I’d say true but not in all situations. I kept mute maybe because it’s not my reality. I haven’t felt the pain of loss over anyone, so I can’t say I understand (yes! go on, scream profanities) but is that enough to say, I'm far removed from their reality? I’d be the first to say NO!! Hell NO!!  Their reality is that their babies have been snatched from them.  My reality is that it could have been my niece, I look at her and I realize how deflated the mums are, not knowing when they will return or when they will hear their endearing voices. I look at my niece and pray she doesn't suffer same fate nor I cry over her abduction.

The kidnap of these young girls and their unaccounted number is enough to say something. That the government’s reality isn't same as their reality. The relaxed way the president treats this is the same way he has treated all life threatening situation in the country. The probable excuse here is to say this isn't his reality? But then he swore to serve a nation and to defend and upload her unity so help him. So isn't that enough to let this become his reality?

The African culture demands the girl child to be subservient.  To be seen not heard so should we say that this is just a typical case of they are girls, so we don’t care. But then, we have evolved or so we think; we have accepted that the female is as important as any male, so why isn't anything done to unearth the whereabouts of the missing girls?. I don’t know the answer, I expect my president and the parliament to decree a search for the girls, not the show off they splash all over the internet.

 I see and read all the solidarity messages, women protesting, international bodies reacting, a hashtag has been created to follow possible leads on the story. But is their( other continents) reality our reality? Of course not. Their reality is one in which their defence and possibly the whole country join in the search and nothing, I mean absolutely nothing will stop them; not sleep. Because their reality is that everyone is their brother and sister’s keeper. So why should ours be different?

The answer is simple. We are now subsets not a collective whole, The westerns have a name for it; racist but we Nigerians are tribalist, we have divided everything into regions, man know man. So our reality cannot be their reality. So until the roof falls down and the fire keep blazing, we will continue to deny the obvious: these girls could be us, our sisters, cousins, nieces. the ultimate question now is;when shall our divided realities become one?